Two More Hints for Self-Motivating Your Children - Plus One for Saving Them and Their Parents a Ton of Money
Here are two of the other methods my wife and I used to self-motivate our kids academically. Once you start them, they pretty much run themselves - getting the results you want with almost no more input from the parents. I don't know if they will work for you, but they sure did for us.
1. PAY YOUR KIDS FOR THEIR GRADES
We didn't give our kids an "allowance", and we didn't pay them to do chores around the house. We paid them for their grades.
We began our program when our eldest was in the fourth grade and our youngest in the second. We were thinking about setting up an allowance system, and we wanted it to reflect the real world. My wife and I were both self-employed, meaning our earnings were dependent on how well we did our jobs. So, we set up an earnings system for our kids - rather than an allowance - based on how well they did their "jobs" as students.
At that time our kids were both pretty good students. Their grades were a mixture of A's and B's when we started the program, but we wanted to motivate them to higher achievement. So, we decided to pay them what we could afford at that time, $20 for each A or A- that they received in each of their five subjects each semester and nothing for lower grades. But, of course, you should choose any amount that fits in your family's budget and your child's current grades.
When we explained the system to our kids, they liked it immediately; but our eldest asked, "What happens if we get a C?" Remembering that they weren't getting C's then anyway, I said, "You owe us twenty bucks." Then he asked, "What happens if we get all A's?" And without thinking I said, "We'll double it." And that turned out to be one of the smartest things I've ever said in my life. It meant that a report card with four A's and one B would earn that child $80 for the semester, but five A's would earn $200 for the semester. That was a difference of $120 for that last A, making it a heavy-duty motivator.
How did it work? Great. Both of our kids got nothing but A's on every report card from then on in elementary and middle school. In fact, we didn't see any B's at all until our eldest got a couple of them in Advanced Placement classes in high school. Then, to be fair, we adjusted our grade standards to reflect the higher work requirements and lower grades available in AP classes.
2. FIND THE "CENTERS OF EXCELLENCE" IN YOUR HIGH SCHOOL
We all know how bad it can be when students start hanging out with the wrong crowd, especially in high school. But the results are exactly the opposite when students hang out with a good crowd. The trick for parents is to find the good crowd in their local high school and to encourage their kids to prepare for it in advance and to participate in it when they get there.
This is how it works. You will find that every high school, no matter how mediocre its overall performance might be, has what you could call "centers of excellence." These are programs where pretty much all the students succeed at the highest level - meaning they all pass their state exams on their first try, they all graduate on time, and they all advance to college. There are usually several of these centers of excellence in each school, and parents can find them by talking with other parents and with school officials. For some of these centers of excellence, students need to take preparatory classes in middle school, so it's best to start this process early.
As an example, the high school in our hometown is not very special academically. Its students do a little bit better than average on state tests, graduation rate, and advancement to college, but that's about it. However, the band program at our high school is a huge center of excellence. When our kids were in it, ten percent of the students in our high school were band members, and just about all of them passed their state exams on their first try, graduated on time, and then went on to college. In fact, if the band members at our high school had been a separate school, their academic performance statistics would have made them the top high school in our state.
Along that line, I developed a potential Centers of Excellence program ten years ago as my class project for a Technical Writing course at our local community college, and here are a couple documents related to that project that you might find interesting:
1. PAY YOUR KIDS FOR THEIR GRADES
We didn't give our kids an "allowance", and we didn't pay them to do chores around the house. We paid them for their grades.
We began our program when our eldest was in the fourth grade and our youngest in the second. We were thinking about setting up an allowance system, and we wanted it to reflect the real world. My wife and I were both self-employed, meaning our earnings were dependent on how well we did our jobs. So, we set up an earnings system for our kids - rather than an allowance - based on how well they did their "jobs" as students.
At that time our kids were both pretty good students. Their grades were a mixture of A's and B's when we started the program, but we wanted to motivate them to higher achievement. So, we decided to pay them what we could afford at that time, $20 for each A or A- that they received in each of their five subjects each semester and nothing for lower grades. But, of course, you should choose any amount that fits in your family's budget and your child's current grades.
When we explained the system to our kids, they liked it immediately; but our eldest asked, "What happens if we get a C?" Remembering that they weren't getting C's then anyway, I said, "You owe us twenty bucks." Then he asked, "What happens if we get all A's?" And without thinking I said, "We'll double it." And that turned out to be one of the smartest things I've ever said in my life. It meant that a report card with four A's and one B would earn that child $80 for the semester, but five A's would earn $200 for the semester. That was a difference of $120 for that last A, making it a heavy-duty motivator.
How did it work? Great. Both of our kids got nothing but A's on every report card from then on in elementary and middle school. In fact, we didn't see any B's at all until our eldest got a couple of them in Advanced Placement classes in high school. Then, to be fair, we adjusted our grade standards to reflect the higher work requirements and lower grades available in AP classes.
2. FIND THE "CENTERS OF EXCELLENCE" IN YOUR HIGH SCHOOL
We all know how bad it can be when students start hanging out with the wrong crowd, especially in high school. But the results are exactly the opposite when students hang out with a good crowd. The trick for parents is to find the good crowd in their local high school and to encourage their kids to prepare for it in advance and to participate in it when they get there.
This is how it works. You will find that every high school, no matter how mediocre its overall performance might be, has what you could call "centers of excellence." These are programs where pretty much all the students succeed at the highest level - meaning they all pass their state exams on their first try, they all graduate on time, and they all advance to college. There are usually several of these centers of excellence in each school, and parents can find them by talking with other parents and with school officials. For some of these centers of excellence, students need to take preparatory classes in middle school, so it's best to start this process early.
As an example, the high school in our hometown is not very special academically. Its students do a little bit better than average on state tests, graduation rate, and advancement to college, but that's about it. However, the band program at our high school is a huge center of excellence. When our kids were in it, ten percent of the students in our high school were band members, and just about all of them passed their state exams on their first try, graduated on time, and then went on to college. In fact, if the band members at our high school had been a separate school, their academic performance statistics would have made them the top high school in our state.
Along that line, I developed a potential Centers of Excellence program ten years ago as my class project for a Technical Writing course at our local community college, and here are a couple documents related to that project that you might find interesting:

centers_of_excellence_in_public_high_schools.pdf | |
File Size: | 900 kb |
File Type: |

centers_of_excellence_-_powerpoint.pptx | |
File Size: | 1148 kb |
File Type: | pptx |
3. HOW TO FIND TRULY AFFORDABLE COLLEGES
A revolutionary change in how to find really affordable colleges - while minimizing student and parent loans - was passed by Congress and signed into law in 2008. That law became fully effective in 2011, but very few college counselors in American high schools know anything about it - and the impact it can have on college searches.
That law requires that all U.S. colleges include free Net Price Calculator programs (NPCs) on their websites. NPCs are totally confidential, and they allow parents to input basic family financial data and get an immediate, accurate estimate of their costs and financial aid at that school for the next year. So, using NPCs, parents and students can sift out unaffordable colleges before the students even apply.
We discovered NPCs early in our kids' college searches, and they guaranteed great results, so I published a website explaining how to make the best use of them. Here's its URL:
www.americancollegegenerosity.com/
I realize that its URL is a mouthful, but it reflects a basic fact:
The net prices of American colleges aren't based on any factors other than their comparative generosity, where some American colleges are wildly more generous than others.
So, enjoy that site, put it to work for you, and remember a relevant phrase I repeat frequently:
That law requires that all U.S. colleges include free Net Price Calculator programs (NPCs) on their websites. NPCs are totally confidential, and they allow parents to input basic family financial data and get an immediate, accurate estimate of their costs and financial aid at that school for the next year. So, using NPCs, parents and students can sift out unaffordable colleges before the students even apply.
We discovered NPCs early in our kids' college searches, and they guaranteed great results, so I published a website explaining how to make the best use of them. Here's its URL:
www.americancollegegenerosity.com/
I realize that its URL is a mouthful, but it reflects a basic fact:
The net prices of American colleges aren't based on any factors other than their comparative generosity, where some American colleges are wildly more generous than others.
So, enjoy that site, put it to work for you, and remember a relevant phrase I repeat frequently: